Breaking Up Is Complicated

A week ago, I think my boyfriend of over a year and I broke up... I mean, we haven't spoken since then and words were said that would make me think we broke up. It was never officially said, but I think it was intended. Anyways, he is a great guy - just different. I have been emotionally and physically feeling normal. I have been taking time to myself and working when I am scheduled. Tonight, I have been getting this feeling of missing him and I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm hoping that by writing this post, maybe it'll help me discover what I should do and/or cope with these feelings. It's tough to walk away when I considered him my best friend. I'm not a girl with close, true friends - but I can say without a doubt that he was one of them. The past couple days, I've been wanting to get out of the house and wanting to do something fun (ex: go to a movie, go out to eat, go shopping, etc), but I want him to come with me. I don't feel those passionate love feelings, but I do care about him. He annoys me, but he makes me laugh. He makes me feel comfortable and relaxed. He is one of my main cheerleaders in life. He makes the real and silly self come out, but he also makes the real and bratty self come out. I was told by multiple individuals not to think about the future and just take it day-by-day. I struggle with that and I struggle when I do picture my future. The one positive I do see in the future is that he will be an absolutely amazing father. I haven't really cried over this like I expected I would, until now. I want to be a better person because of all this - I know, for the most part, I caused this break-up and it physically hurts my heart thinking about it. My mind and heart flops back and forth - it's frustrating and exhausting for both of us. As my mind and heart flip flops, his heart has stayed steady and consistent. I think that's what hurts the most is that I am unable to reciprocate that...